Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
