Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
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