that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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