So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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