And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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