he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
