TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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