We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
