Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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