yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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