sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize