I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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