We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
being pregnant is like rehab
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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