I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
