She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
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They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
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He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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