sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
My cat gives me a boner
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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