How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize