I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
We need to feng shui this bitch.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize