please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
