I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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