remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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