Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
he thought i was a dude.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
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I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
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please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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