I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
