You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
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At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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