remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Why can't burritos get me drunk
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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