I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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