Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
