i think i have herpe
just one?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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