THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
