i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
