I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
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