I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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