but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize