so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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