I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
false alarm. still invincible.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
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