Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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