Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize