ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards