She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
