when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Randomize
