other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
