At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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