You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
