Texts From Last Night

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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Knowing your life, probably not.

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  (832): I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right? (303): Knowing your life, probably not. http://tfl.nu/p5sh
  Replies (4) Good night (729) Bad night (3009)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great

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  (804): Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great http://tfl.nu/xifb
  Replies (26) Good night (5589) Bad night (408) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.

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  (360): afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep. http://tfl.nu/xylt
  Replies (52) Good night (1468) Bad night (7968) Order T-Shirt
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  (661): View more from California

  Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.

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  (661): Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up. http://tfl.nu/ev42
  Replies (22) Good night (5066) Bad night (1647) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it

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  (914): i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it http://tfl.nu/9xaf
  Replies (36) Good night (6889) Bad night (1086) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.

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  (678): He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going. http://tfl.nu/db5s
  Replies (20) Good night (4565) Bad night (896) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones

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  (904): My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones http://tfl.nu/lwep
  Replies (8) Good night (2743) Bad night (1327) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"

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  (239): I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself" http://tfl.nu/9vkt
  Replies (6) Good night (2243) Bad night (1128) Order T-Shirt
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed

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  (704): dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed http://tfl.nu/q2zi
  Replies (8) Good night (2219) Bad night (832) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious

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  (813): I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious http://tfl.nu/g6os
  Replies (3) Good night (1546) Bad night (616) Order T-Shirt
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.

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  (204): We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day. http://tfl.nu/b3rk
  Replies (15) Good night (3656) Bad night (522)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets

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  (734): I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets http://tfl.nu/shph
  Replies (6) Good night (1212) Bad night (346) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets

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  (310): Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets http://tfl.nu/hmgm
  Replies (3) Good night (1612) Bad night (334) Order T-Shirt
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero

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  (571): Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero http://tfl.nu/k0h6
  Replies (9) Good night (1370) Bad night (323) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers

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  (402): I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers http://tfl.nu/eskp
  Replies (1) Good night (276) Bad night (448) Order T-Shirt

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