Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
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