Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
someone threw a dead crab at me
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
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After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
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He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
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