Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
