Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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