Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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