so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
