I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
