If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
