Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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