Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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